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If you are dating a single parent, do you have concerns about how their children will affect your relationship? Don’t worry, there are many ways you can help the relationship with both with your new partner and their kids. Take the time to understand the issues and there is no reason why your relationship should not go smoothly.

By appreciating that as a single parent, your partners kids will always come first, you will be able to understand that the odd cancellation of plans is inevitable. It is important not to take this personally as unwell children and childcare problems are beyond your partners control and try to understand that you will both be disappointed.

If your partner no longer lives with their children, you’ll probably find that you are not included in access visits to start with. This is no reflection on you or your relationship. It’s just that these times are very precious both to the children and their parent. Avoid putting any pressure on your partner and let them decide when the time is right to include you.

By respecting the privacy of your partner and their kids during access visits, you’ll avoid the children feeling you are taking their parents attention away from them. This can result in some jealousy and resentment, so try not to call or drop in when your partner has the kids and never ask your partner to cancel these visits.

If your partner is the full time carer for their kids, it is easy to feel pushed out at times. However, being a single parent is very tough. Guilt and exhaustion are probably the feelings they’ll experience more than any other, so don’t be surprised if sometimes your partner simply doesn’t have the energy to arrange a babysitter for a night on the town. Try to make arrangements well in advance to give your partner time to sort out childcare arrangements and show your understanding of the situation.

In the early days of your relationship, your new partner will probably be very reluctant to let you know personal details. It is a protective instinct and they will be looking from understanding from you. The best way to build trust is to share information about yourself. Don’t keep unnecessary secrets. If you are open and inclusive about your background, friendships and work life, your partner will feel more comfortable sharing information with you. However, give it time and don’t put pressure on them to give details until they are ready.

Cheryl Ashbrook runs the online dating tips website www.MaxMyProfile.co.uk which provides online dating advice and services for men and women. If you would like to read more articles on dating as a single parent please visit the single parent dating section at MaxMyProfile.